Internet connection at home has not yet been fixed for a week now. Sad. I couldn't post my so-close-up pic of Jason Wade during Lifehouse's performance at TV5's launch and the videos of Gary V. that I recorded at his concert. Tsk, tsk.

Anyhow, I went home in Nueva last weekend after 2 months. I so missed home -- sleeping with my parents' at their bed, waking up a bit later than my regular wake up time with Daddy's breadfast awaiting me at the dining table, watching TV all night long, cuddling and teasing and kissing my nephews until they get irritated (good tita! hihi!), catching up and kwentuhan and LOL with my churchmates, tambay and foodtrip at Ate Cha's place. And so on and so forth.

I also missed Ate Tin. After several months, I finally caught her! She passed by the house an hour before I left for Manila yesterday. She personally handed me my invitation to her wedding. She grew bigger and has shouting pimples all over her face. But she still carries with her that cheerful, bubbly character. We just had a quick kwentuhan, not as lively and enthusiastic though as before. So I finally heard it straight from her. I didn't know how to react. But I could see a hint of regret in her eyes. I could feel the melancholy.

Last night, in my room, I was thinking about what happened and what Kuya Jon told me about accountability. Two of my closest friends have already been into that kind of situation and it made me think what have I done or have NOT for them as a friend. I asked myself, "Where was I when they needed a friend who will encourage or comfort them, or will simply serve as a sounding board?" Maybe I was too busy with my own personal issues that I forgot that I also am a friend who may be needed by someone. All these made me think what kind of a friend I am to my friends.

I remember a conversation with my church friend when I myself experienced being "alone" at one lowly point in my life. I mentioned that personally, there are certain qualities that I look for a person for me to be able to say that he/she is my real friend, that I can really count on him/her. I pondered on these qualities and reflected if I actually possess them. Sadly, I found out that I lack many of them.

I felt sad about what happened. But there is none that I can do turn things upside down. Maybe I'm also being taught a lot lessons from all these. And I'm hoping to learn them.

Okay, I'm already being melodramatic. Hope we'll have our internet back soon!